Apologies for my lack of communication. Please select an excuse below that makes you feel the best about my abscence.
-So busy with Uni
-Without internet (e.g spent some time in a cave or some other desolate hole. Highly unlikely considering I just moved to the largest city in the country but whatever tickles your fancy)
-Thinking of you so much I lost my mind and forgot what a computer was
Anyway, bucket full of soz about my disappearing act. My whole life has changed since I last blogged, how's that for a starting point?
I live in the big city now (Or average-small city depending on where you're from) and it's a strange reality. My sleepless nights are coloured by fire engine sirens and screaming drunkards on the street below. It's not safe to walk home or outside after dark and it's never a good idea to talk to a stranger. I can't recall seeing the same person twice on the street that I live on, and in the midst of the crowds it's the loneliest place I've ever known.
Everything feels a little out of reach at times. Even the cups in the kitchen cupboard. I don't really know where I'm going or what I'm doing. I spend my days trying to write music that will meet requirements and have little time to sing my heart the way I used to. I'm learning to love new voices and I'm learning that comparing myself to them will get me nowhere. I've decided that there is beauty in all writing if it is honest, and that if a heart is worn on a piece of paper it will inevitably encourage yours to open up even if only by half an inch.
I'm discovering new things about love and it's various expressions and movements everyday. I live with my best friends and it's wonderful. We cry together, we laugh together, most importantly we watch Miranda together. My sister lives just down the road and she's just as beautiful as ever.
I miss home all the time. Right now I'm back on break and I've never felt so content. I love the silence at nighttime. I love the kisses from my mother in the morning and I love the jokes of my father over lunch.
It's hard to try and summarise. How does one go about summing up the biggest change in their life yet? Well, God is faithful. He is faithful through the hardship. He is present in my sleepless nights. He is there when I can't reach the cups in the kitchen cupboard. He is smiling when he see's the beauty in my relationships. His heart is aching for me when homesickness brings me to breaking point.
God is faithful. Let's hope I can be a little more faithful with these posts, I need to let the writing studies major in me loose.