And when we flick off the light switch we are faced with the beds we make for ourselves.
Though completely consumed by the darkness surrounding, questions stare us down until our weary minds resort to sleep. We twist and turn in the silence and fight away the things that the daylight only conceal, our fears, insecurities, feelings.

Our hearts remain restless while we wrestle with the night, until sleep brings us a sweet new day,

A chance to change.

And that canvas with that picture you painted for my birthday this year,
I painted it white today
It is blank


Ready to start over,


So am I

"He might be your first love, but he won't be your last"

Wow.

Are you kidding me?

And I stumbled across a photograph that felt like a kick in my gut
Everything about me had been stripped bare from the linings of your life
It was fresh and new and everything that we're supposed to be now.
All moved around to somehow create a start-over face for you
The space I belonged in was empty, any hopeless remainders of me cleaned away, either moved into hiding, or simply discarded for some other stranger to take note of on their way elsewhere.
Then I noticed the piece of another broken heart just waiting to be picked up.
As one rises, another falls
What's it going to be?

And the only thing keeping me going is knowing that oneday you're going to be happier without me.

Dear Bridget Jones,
I have just found myself lipsyncing Celine Dions "All By Myself" whilst eating too much and being overemotional. We are quite similar, except that you were drinking wine and I am eating gummy snakes because I am underage and do not enjoy the taste nor the effects of alcohol. Though I realise this means that we are both very pathetic, we should probably be friends. We could listen to it together and not be all by ourselves.
It would be a much better plan.
Yours Sincerely,
Lydia

If we'd never tried
We'd never know
If it never rained
We'd never grow

"Lonely was the song I sang, 'til the day you came
Showing me a better way and all that my love can bring
Oh half of my heart's got a grip on the situation
Half of my heart takes time
Half of my heart's got a right mind to tell you
That I can't keep loving you
Oh, with half of my heart
With half of my heart
But I can't stop loving you
But I can't stop loving you"

Oh John Mayer.

There are two constant things in life
Change and Jesus

"Courage
it takes a lot of courage to release the familiar
and seemingly secure,
to embrace the new.
But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful.
There is more security in the adventurous and exciting,
for in movement there is life,
and in change
there is power"- Alan Cohen

Faith

You gotta have a little.

Oh life,

You are such a crazy, beautiful, heartbreaking thing.

Lauren Joy Ness,

You are pretty much like sunshine and I love you to pieces

And at the end of the day, there's a deeper peace than I've ever known before.

Though it's terrifying to see someone you love gradually slipping away, there's comfort in knowing that they aren't afraid, that they aren't facing the unknown, that they know we're they're headed. It's a quiet presence in the room where you lie, its the squeeze of your hand and the hope in your eyes, its the love that you voice, the happiness that you share when faced with the end of the only road you've ever known. He looks at you as though he'd take on the world to give you one more day, the kind of love that only comes from a lifetime of friendship and deep understanding, the kind of love that will never be replicated or replaced. Your life has been beautiful, I'm praying that mine will be as full of faith and love as yours has been for all your 82 years. It's okay to stop fighting now, please just tell Jesus I say hi.

"Be carried on the wings of grace, where you'll meet Jesus face to face,

Heavens arms are open wide, go with angels by your side"

Just as they walked out
You walked in and changed it all

Sing me a song and we'll dance in the rain

Tell me a story, from side to side we'll sway

Laugh til it hurts, smile til its permanent

Look how far we've come

Look how much we've learnt

"I have decided to follow Jesus

I have decided to follow Jesus

I have decided to follow Jesus

No turning back, no turning back

The cross before me, the world behind me

The cross before me, the world behind me

The cross before me, the world behind me

No turning back, no turning back"

I will never be alone, regardless of the way it looks.

"Peace

It does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, misunderstanding or confusion

It means to be in the midst of all these,

and still feel calm in your heart. "